This is my dog, Thor Michaelson:
He is completely awesome. He has a majestic tail, a handsome profile and devil-may-care attitude. PLUS, a floppy ear. Everybody knows that some of the best dogs have floppy ears. He is an all around, good looking dog.
This is my grandmother’s dog, Suri:
She’s pretty sweet, I guess. But she’s not MY dog who, as we discussed earlier, is incredibly awesome. While my grandmother is in a skilled nursing facility for physical therapy, her dog is staying with us.
I’m not going to lie to you. I think my grandmother has abused this poor little doggy since the day she got her. Not physically or even verbally, but my gram never bothered to train her and because of that, Suri has no idea what the rules are. And because of that, she has no real idea of how to be a dog. She doesn’t know how to walk on a leash. She doesn’t understand going poo outside. Ferchrissake, there was a squirrel in the park yesterday and she walked around it.
I know it’s not Suri’s fault but I can’t have a dog here that doesn’t know how to be a dog. I won’t put up with begging at the table or snapping at fingers because she doesn’t want to move or eating all the cat food or putting her stinky butt all over my pillow.
So yesterday, Thor Michaelson went to day care and I spent some time teaching Suri what we expect of her when she stays here.
It went…ok. She is completely baffled by the potty training but all kinds of enthusiastic about leash training. She was delighted to accompany me in the afternoon when I walked down to pick the kids up from school. This is usually Thor’s job but like I said, he was at day care.
Because dogs are not allowed on school property, we usually wait on the lawn across the parking lot from school – about 100 feet away from where everyone gathers to pick up their kids. I stood on the lawn trying to calm Suri down from all the excitement and also because she’s terrified of large open spaces.
Across the parking lot, I saw the familiar blue-green coat of my friend Candy. I hadn’t seen Candy for a while and it occurred to me that she had no idea we were fostering my grandmother’s dog. I mean, she’s used to this handsome guy:
And there I was with 75% less dog, in the wrong color. How confusing would that be?
The more I thought about this, the more it made me laugh. The more I laughed, the more I wanted to see her reaction – but she wouldn’t turn around!
So I texted her.
And for five magical seconds, the world was hilarious.